Monthly Archives: July 2010

Feet…

So, here it is!  My very first blog post.  Since those of you reading this probably know me more than extremely well at this point, I’ll start off by sharing some information I gathered regarding one of my less attractive features: my webbed toes.

Yes, this condition is something that has been with me my entire life,  though I wasn’t truly aware anything was wrong with me until people began to point it out.  It is difficult for me to remember who first brought this trait to my attention, but I think it’s safe to say it was my father and his insistence that I must be a gifted swimmer.  And though some people (Jennifer) deny that my toes are truly webbed, the fact that I had to alter my toe socks in fifth grade to accommodate the less dexterous “two” should be evidence enough.  I have been dwelling on this deformity in recent weeks due to the hot weather and consequent visibility of my toes, so I decided to do some research.

Here’s what I found out:

  • “webbed toes” is a layman’s term for syndactyly affecting the feet.  It is of course, most common in birds and amphibians, and does occasionally occur in humans.  It is associated with a bunch of rare conditions I’ve never heard of, but I’m fairly sure none of these conditions apply to me.
  • Can occur as partial or complete.  Lucky for me, I’m only partial.  This could however be due to the freakish length of my feet which I owe to my father (size 14 shoe)
  • Only 1 in 2000-2500 babies are fated to suffer this purely cosmetic imperfection.  A large part of why some people display their web proudly.  We are special!

This is a complete web, displayed proudly with a tattoo (THIS IS NOT MY FOOT)

  • Webbed toes are fetishized in some circles.  No surprise there.
  • Famous people with webbed feet include Ashton Kutcher, Dan Aykroyd, and Joseph Stalin.
  • Webbed toes eliminate the possibility of athlete’s foot in said webbed area.
  • There is no evidence to support the idea that individuals with webbed toes are better swimmers.  Sorry, Dad.

I did learn a lot about my feet through this research, but at the end of the day, I looked down, and they were still webbed.  Though most of the facts which appear on this list are cons (see Ashton Kutcher, Stalin), I was able to take some comfort in that my condition personally is not even close to severe.  I have never meet a person with toes quite like mine, and therefore had no basis for comparison.  But, man, it could be way worse. If you decide to do a little independent research, you’ll see, Jennifer has (semi)good reason to suggest that my toes are normal.  Most of the time, my web goes completely unnoticed.  Sometimes, people even mistakenly tell me  that my toes are cute!  I humbly thank them for the comment and hide my little tootsies before they have time to examine further.  Basically what I’m trying to say is, that even though Jennifer doesn’t think I’m special, my toes are still webbed. And the only way to end the stigma is to educate the masses.  I’m not one of those aforementioned “proud” people who wears my web as a badge of individuality, but at least I won’t get athlete’s foot.

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